Written By: Jessica Farquhar Campbell
My earliest money memories have to do with child support checks, the story being that my mom had to beg my dad for something he was legally bound to give her every month. My parents divorced when I was seven, so I don’t know if that is an actual memory or just part of the larger narrative that was told to me. Either way, it planted a determination in me that I would never find myself in a situation where I was reliant on someone else for money.
Alas, my calling was to become a poet, so reconciling my vocation with a financially fulfilling career would become my challenge. I didn’t get my first salaried job until I was 33 years old. By that time I was divorced, like my mom, with two kids, and that’s when the determination really set in. I decided to prioritize earning money and financial independence over following my poetry passion.
When I graduated from my creative writing MFA program, I went from making $13,000 as a graduate student to $55,000 as an entry-level corporate consultant. I thought I had made it big. I felt independent, proud, and at the same time very scared because I thought I was giving up my freedom.
To my surprise, there were dormant parts of myself that were awakened by the order and structure of corporate life. The efficiency of online calendars, the systems, and the whole new lexicon to learn–I loved it all. My job was ok, but what I really sunk my teeth into was understanding the organizational complexity. I knew that if I could learn to navigate it, I could find a more fulfilling job in this gigantic corporation, and make more money at the same time. There was lots of money to be earned, and that was truly the most important lesson I learned that set me on the path to doubling my earnings several times over during my 11 years at that company: you have to be (more than) ok with earning money.
Here are the seven shifts I have made to my money mindset that made a difference.
Own the desire. If you are reading this, you probably want to earn more money. But if you dig down into your psyche, there might be something holding you back. Do you judge people negatively when you perceive they have wealth? As a poet, I had some ideas about creativity and earnings being incompatible. I had to work through that and be ok with earning in order to turn that corner.
Face the numbers. When we are not earning like we want to, it can be daunting to open our bank app and see that low balance. But knowledge is power. The better handle you have on reality, the easier it becomes to make changes. Whether you choose a traditional budgeting model or not, facing your reality is critical. Take a deep breath, stay open-minded, and make a date with yourself to check-in.
Educate yourself. There are so many resources out there—books, podcasts, apps—that are geared toward women (meaning, not that they talk down to us but that they recognize our lives are different from men who built these systems originally). Obviously, you don’t need to limit yourself to women-targeted resources. The main thing is to build a habit of learning continuously.
Invest. Your salary is not the end-all-be-all. In fact, it is not how you build wealth. Investing is the only way to build wealth in the span of a lifetime. Investing takes time, though, so start yesterday. Make this topic a priority on your educational journey and get creative about growing your money.
Try a mantra. You might find yourself in the same money patterns of overspending, making impulse buys that you regret later, or just struggling to muster up the faith in yourself that truly draws money toward you. I have gone through periods where telling myself or writing an affirmation every day helped me overcome negative self-talk or subconscious talk tracks. Something as simple as “I am confident in my ability to make money” can start to shift your mindset.
Negotiate. There are only so many opportunities we have to advocate for ourselves when it comes to money. If you work a corporate job, this is when you are accepting a position or promotion. If you work for yourself, it’s when you set your rates and create contracts with clients. Do not waste these opportunities! Aiming high when you ask for your pay helps everyone, not just you. Your client or employer is getting a self-assured, high-quality, and high-performing resource. The universe of powerful women is expanding. It is scary, it takes more time than just saying “yes” to the first offer, but it feels so good on the other side. And the impacts are exponential, meaning your next promotion is that much bigger, etc.
Talk about money. This goes back to not hiding. The more you can comfortably talk about money, the more power you hold over it. This could be with friends (Women, talk to other women about money! Women, talk to men about money!) or an advisor or accountant. Open up about your salary so we can create pay transparency together.
When I left my corporate job after eleven years, my earnings package was nearly six times my starting salary. I walked away with a portfolio of investments, money in the bank, a brand-new motorcycle, and college funds for my kids. If this kind of “bragging” makes you uncomfortable, go back to step one. As women, we need to take what's ours. The system was not built for us, and in many ways, it is stacked against us, especially our non-white girlfriends.
It's liberating and empowering to manage our money. More resources are available to us than ever (like Ellevest, the Budgetnista, and Barabara (Stanny) Huson’s books). But it doesn't take anything special to open up your bank app and take an honest look at your finances. I often found it was way less scary than I made it out to be in my mind.
Where will you start?
This post supports the Kentucky Health Justice Network.
Meet the Author
Jessica Farquhar Campbell
Jessica Farquhar Campbell helps creative and enterprising women get to the very top. She holds an MFA in Creative Writing from Purdue and is the author of the poetry chapbook, Dear Motorcycle Enthusiast. She has completed executive education on positive leadership through the Ross School of Business at the University of Michigan and is a Certified Core Strengths facilitator partner. She publishes Transformation Maps, an online journal about wielding power at work, and offers career coaching services through her consulting firm, Frittata. Book your free micro-coaching session with her today.
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