Written By: Lauren Howard
I had so many stupid excuses.
I was full of them.
I’ll be happier when I get the next promotion.
I’ll feel satisfied once we have enough in our savings.
I’ll spend more time with friends once I can fit into my pre-pregnancy clothes.
In the last few years, I've learned something really important.
If you treat happiness like a destination, you will absolutely never get there.
For a lot of years, happiness wasn’t even on my roadmap. It was something that other people felt. I thought grinding, earning as the sole focus and forgoing self-care were the keys to achieving.
Goals and aspirations are part of the process, but satisfaction is not transactional. There is no “achievement unlocked” announcement that tells you when you’re there.
That doesn’t mean you should be fine with having less than you deserve. It doesn’t mean you can just turn on happiness and contentment. I’m not saying that you should stay in a toxic environment or be abused because you should be able to feel happy anywhere.
But you can’t just earn your way there, either.
You can earn your way to security. You can promote your way to the kind of resume that gets you credibility in your field. You can use your earnings to introduce convenience into your life, which yields contentment and reduces stress.
But there is no salary that makes you satisfied with who is in the mirror. There is no physical appearance change that automatically makes you feel like you love yourself and want to be more of this person.
Self-care, giving back, finding community, turning off, and resting are all important pieces of the puzzle.
You can’t hustle yourself there. There’s no trophy at the end. There are just a bunch of empty things that are supposed to make you happy and just don’t.
Satisfaction is a function of balance, not a guaranteed outcome of a title or a bank account or a funding raise.
Founder & CEO at elletwo
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